Emergency Sex
Wednesday, August 25, 2004
  A bit of background: Recently, I celebrated my 22 birthday. Graduated from college in May 2004, but currently unemployed. I am a gay male, but I have never had sexual relations with another person, not even a kiss. During high school, I was overweight, topping out at about 220 pounds. In the past four years, I have tried to turn my life around; eating right and working out to reach a weight of 160 pounds. A lot of my issues that I am working on have to deal with my body, my self esteem and my sexuality. I still have some ways to go, but hopefully, I can use this tool as a means to that end.

Reading what I have written, it sounds like I am a social retard. Think what you want, but don't feel sorry for me or even pity me. I have decent group of beautiful friends and family who I feel comfortable and feel at home with. I am truly blessed in other aspects of life, for which I am eternally grateful.

Hopefully, what I would like to achieve from this is to establish a sort of communication with the world (or just the abyss of the internet) in terms of my sexuality. Share my personal stories, triumphs, and struggles with others who are facing the same things as I am.

With all that's going on in the world, it seems to be a selfish endeavour, but it's a personal crisis that has caused me great pain and agony over the past few years. If I am stuck at this hurdle, I am not able to go out and pursue my real passion nor do any good in this world.

In the meantime, I am striving to be candid, exposed, raw and truthful about my life. All I can give right now is just to be real. 
Comments:
Hi... I found your blog interesting. I'm 27 and I have been battling weight issues since I was in high school. I got up to 220 when I was in college and then I moved to LA. I lost 50 lbs in 6 months after making it my 2001 new years resolution. Eventually I put a lot of it back on, and have yo-yo'd between 160 and 190 for the past couple years. I'm trying to get back down to 165 again.
 
It has been hard for me too. I've tried keeping my weight down for some time, but it's all to no avail. I also yo-yo between 155-160 pounds. I am going to give those online dieting/exercise sites a try though too. I've had a personal trainer in the past, but I find that my main problem is my eating habits. When I work out, my mind tells me that since I have exercised for the day, I can slightly eat more than usual. So, we'll see how this new online diet/exercise experience goes.
 
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